I know you are all holding your breath while sitting in front of your computer for the next post about Colin. Well, here it is. Feel free to breathe now. He has been saying “mama” for about a month and a half now. Two days ago he said “dada” for the first time. It was more like “laaaaamaaabaaaooooDADA” Of course Mark was not here to hear it. He was working, as usual. I have decided that work sucks. But thank you to the employers of Mark, for if it were not for you, we would not be able to afford to live in this spider infested, leaking-water-moldy walled, shower that doesn’t drain, racoons living in the roof, and 1″ gap around the entire side door, wonderful house we live in. Not sure if that made perfect sense, but I’m sure it made NONSENSE. However, we are fully able to afford the cable we have been getting for FREE for the past three months. Ha ha ha to the dumb cable company who put holes in our wall while hammering in the cable line around the door frame.

Anyway, the world is anxiously waiting for a post from MOB regarding his trip to Chicago last weekend. Tell us, oh wise one.

Happy happy, joy joy. The message board that gives me hours of pleasure every day, that consists of other mothers and their 8 month old babies, has been LOCKED and is now READ ONLY. Why, you ask? (as if you care) Because, apparently, mothers’ of 8 month olds do NOT know how to play nice with each other. Name-calling, mud-slinging, the altering of other peoples childrens pictures, writing on the bathroom wall with permanent marker “Your mom is a slut”, and other such nonsense has gotten us to this point. Sounds extremely familiar to the spectacle our great country goes through every 4 years as we elect our new leader… hmmm, interesting observation. So how is it that our country doesn’t get a “time-out” in the corner? “(delivered in a sobbing, chest-heaving voice) All I wanted to do was talk about how CUTE and SMART and ADVANCED and BEAUTIFUL my child is!” By the way, he’s reading at the 10th grade level already. And he’ll be running for president in the 2008 election. Vote early, and vote often.

Well my friends, the time is near to elect our leader for the next four years. Don’t vote for that guy. Don’t vote for that guy either. Vote for him over there. Or how about her over there.

I am feeling slightly old today. My back hurt as I crawled out of bed. My shoulder aches from lugging around a squirming 25-lb scream for 2 hours last night, and 3 1/2 the night before. My hips hurt (still) from giving birth to that same squirming 25-lb scream, over 8 months ago. Anyway, the point was, I’m mostly feeling old because this will be my second presidential election. When I was young (as if I’m not right now) I never thought I’d be old enough to vote, or old enough to care. But, now I am, and now I do.

Lets all band together and vote in a third party, so as to have more than 2 evils to choose from the next time around. Of course, someones probably changed that law by now, and the law now says I AM GOD HERE! So go in peace, and find your polling place some time on Tuesday. The future is happening whether you like it or not. I am now an MTV spokesperson, and I say “Rock the Vote”. Have a spooky Halloween. Stay tuned for pictures of a squirming 25-lb snorting pig. :-)

I believe that being a good parent is wanting to squeeze and hug and kiss and love and bite the cheeks off your child and chew them up everyday. Just look at those cheeks! Don’t you want to eat them up!

SuperCaliFragaListicExtraCryingBaby…

Somedays the crying seems to go on and on and on… Not the baby’s crying, but my own. When I don’t get enough sleep, even 30 seconds of his crying can make me want to cry. But last night I had about 10 hours of sleep. You’d think that was enough to feel rested. However, I woke up once wondering why the baby hadn’t woken up yet. Then, I woke up because the baby did wake up. Then, I got woken up by my husband getting out of bed. And then I woke up cause I had to pee. And the baby woke up for good in the morning. Well, now the baby is asleep for his morning nap, and I feel like I didn’t get any sleep! Waking up that much during the night doesn’t sound that bad, and it really isn’t, but the fact that it takes me about 1/2 hour to fall back to sleep each time, is the problem. So that is my rant of the day. Those of you who are childless, enjoy your sleep. Those of you with children, enjoy your children!

That says sAx, not sEx. You dirty minded people. Anyway, so yesterday was the first day of my saxophone lessons with the guy named Steve. Since we cannot afford to pay anyone to teach me, the deal is homemade cookies and dinner for lessons. So, during the day Colin took a long nap and I baked oatmeal raisin cookies, plain oatmeal cookies (for those who don’t like raisins) and chocolate no bake cookies. Granted they are “no bake” cookies, but that doesn’t mean they don’t still take a chunk of time to make! I spent a good part of two hours making wonderful smelling cookies that I was not supposed to eat. Well, I ate some of them anyway. So, Steve, the sax guy is supposed to show up at 4:30pm, as per our conversation on Monday when we set the whole thing up. 4:30 rolls around, and he’s not here. No problem, I know there’s plenty of God-awful traffic heading this way around that time. 5 o’clock. No Steve. 5:30, I’m thinking, “where in the heck is this guy??? Bloated and Dead on the side of the road?” By SIX THIRTY Mark grumbles, “I don’t think he’s coming” through a mouthful of oatmeal raisin cookies. I check my phone to see if maybe I didn’t hear it ring and he had some really good excuse as to why he couldn’t make it. No phone calls. I check my e-mail to see if he was being held captive in Iraq and about to be beheaded and I am the only one that can help him. No e-mails. WTF??? Hello?? If you make plans with someone who is desperate to learn to play the saxophone, you’d better have a darn good excuse as to why you’re not showing up! At 7:15 Mark and I went to visit his friend who was playing some game with miniature pewter figures (what the heck is that, you ask? I have no idea) and don’t even see the guy til the game is over. What a waste of my life, waiting and waiting and waiting, and NOT getting to PLAY the SAX!!! AHHHHH. And that is the way it goes…

Tell me, what is this from… “I HAVE THE POWER…” Tee hee. Yes, you know it, and you know you loved it also. We set up Colin’s college fund today. We’re investing $30 a month (that’s the minimum) into some mutual funds, and some day in about 500 years Colin will have enough money to afford a community college! Yay for inflation!! Ok, this is pretty much a test of nonsensical things to come… Enjoy further ramblings at some point in the future. Ta ta.