I do sometimes think I am in danger of or deserve hell. Then I realise that I must be because I laughed myself silly over UT’s last…Lucky for me He only takes sinners…

Ooo ooh are England out of the footie cup and the tennis? Will Saddam get back into power?

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the Monsignor for some tips to stop his nervousness.

The Monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.”

So the next Sunday he took the Monsignor’s advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm.

Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on the door:

1. Sip the Vodka, don’t gulp.

2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.

3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.

4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.

5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.

6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.

7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the Spook.

8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.

9. When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don’t say he was stoned off his ass.

10. We do not refer to the cross as the Big T.

11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, ‘Take this and eat it for it is my body’. He did not say ‘Eat me’.

12. The Virgin Mary is not called Mary with the Cherry.

13. The recommended grace before a meal is not Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.

14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter’s, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy’s.

The true biblicone t-shirt store… I dont get a profit. See also the twowaybidet t-shirt store.

I have to post about one of the stupidest games I have played for the PS2: World Soccer Winning Eleven 7. This game straight sucks. The visuals are good. But thats all it has going for it. The game constantly cheats. When your player gets the ball, its instantly stripped away from even the worst opponent. When the other team has the ball, and you try to run and get them, the computer switches the player you control to one far from the action…. constantly running towards the action but never quite getting there. No matter what team you pick, your defense is the worst one in the game. One single opponent can break through your defense and score, where as your best player cant even get past just a single defenseman let alone get close enough to shoot to score. This game is recommended only if you like to lose. GAY.

Fasten your belt seat and get ready for off blast…
Elektroink - Supersonik
German music at its best. Translated into English for your listening pleasure.

### Happy Birthday Coney ###
Now you can still not drink.

### Happy Birthday to ME ###
Twenty eight years of living in a bubble.

Holland v Czech Republic

Now that is what the English invented football for. Excellent game!!