My Saturday has been rudely disturbed by the masses of people and cars who seem to have the same bright idea as me to go shopping. Dont they have better things to do than mull around and dither in the Cooking sauce section? So, banished to my 4X4 Antelope mower with the kids, I read the paper whilst Mrs Hooligan went on a napkin spree and some sort of rug for the dog??!!??

Things i read that made me make facial expressions :

1. Guinea, North West Africa, is a small and corrupt country. 7 Million people, of which three quarters are illiterate, earn a few hundred pounds a year doing not alot but trying to survive. Most asked say that they have never heard of Iraq and the radios dont mention anything about it, yet the country is on the UN Security Council and has a vote on what will happen next. Erm?????

2. US Anti-Europeanism. Im bloody well not standing for anyone sticking me in the same box as the French. I blame my parents, I wanted to be Antarctican.

3. Jim Davidson (Brit comic, married many times, got drunk alot and was rude). I like ol’Jim. My Dad likes Jim and my Father-In law likes Jim. Actually, Pa-In law probably hates the man, but thats his loss, not mine. Yes, he drank alot and got loud and said stuff and hit his wife and vomitted in places he shouldnt have but, does that make him a bad person? :-) Oh, and he can be racist, I know all this. I still like Ol’Jim D.

4. Bidets. The people who own my house wont allow me to have a bidet. I dont need a bidet or really want one, but I still think I should have the choice. Sign the GIVE HOOLY A BIDET petition at TwowayBidet.com